Watch Out Beedles About

Beedles Lake: A pleasant forecast yet high winds greeted the travelling 11, with no bearded claw handed TV presenter or hidden cameras around. Although…there was the burly, cheerful, yet slightly camp, imposing starter. Despite regular referrals to us as ‘gentlemen’ a feeling of being 17 years old and waiting to be ID’d outside the Palais, being caught adding an extra penny chew in the bag at the local newsagent or being caught carrying a firearm, dawned in the debrief. Failure to show a working pitch mark repairer would categorically result in no golf and a drive back up the A46! Fortunately, repairers were hustled and all passed the acid test and were free to advance to go and not directly to jail.

Tuckwell Snr, Ladd and Hefter were unleashed with the 18 hole land speed record in sight. A.T opened in promising fashion with a couple of 3 pointers after a monster putt on the opener, unfortunately there was only one way to go from there… Ladd got in the mood with a lengthy one of his own on 6 for a ‘fill yer boots’ birdie. Stroke 1 proved troublesome with Hefter registering the lone point as the pace increased. Tuckwell with one eye on Tuscany appeared in a rush losing his 2nd ball in 2 holes on 7 & 8. Ladd by 3 at the turn. With the remaining groups a dot on the landscape, A.T slipped in the fact would be ‘abroad’ for the next month which was too much for the weakening Ladd, already ‘cricketed out’ from Saturday. Determined not to lose his 5th ball of the day A.T ventured into unchartered swamp like territory and blasted out a mudcaked object, which may have been a ball, on to the green. Ladd refused to mark fearing scurvy, dysentery or e-bola. Hefter again the only one troubling the scorecard up the last as they waited… waited… waited for the others to arrive.

Hoenigmann, fresh with ’06 Skegness mud, Proludic partner in crime, Dennis, Meadows and Daft provided the filling in the TGS sandwich. Daft dicing with eternal damnation after ducking out of a ‘vows rehearsal’ and an out-laws christening (top man!) Meadows, ripped and ready was off to a quick start along with Daft. 3 and 4 pointers were plentiful amongst the four ball in a profitable 9 holes. Meadows by 1. The wind appeared to derail a trio of challenges after the turn although God appeared to forgive young Richard’s decision, doffed his golfing hat, and rewarded thou noble squire with 5, 3 pointers! Hoenigmann was solid through the mid section before being targeted by a Tuckwell Jnr duck hook. Meadows consolidated for another post 30 score although surely not far off a ‘biggie’. Daft kept the faith to see him through.

Baker (the power) Snr, Bungay, Brown and Tuckwell Jnr were last up. Brown started with purpose: driving the first and lipping out for eagle. Tuckwell clinging on to the coat tails. Baker found it difficult off the tee but laughed in the face of deep rough and awkwardly placed trees regaining position with unerring disdain and accuracy. Bungay proved ‘Horsburghesque’: straight and accurate in a steady accumulation of points. Brown and Tuckwell reduced the Par 5 9th to a bludgeon and a flick, and just missed their eagle putts to lead by 1 from the ever steady Bungay. Baker began cranking up the voltage inversely draining energy from a tiring Bungay: a big 4 points on 11 increasing the wattage. Brown became unstuck on the tricky 16th but bounced back with a sand save birdie on 17. Tuckwell appeared to riding his luck up the stretch, a bridge and a tree saving a watery grave on 16 and 18 with Hoenigmann the saviour on 17 (sorry Mike!) The final 4 finally made it to the club house to find the opening group in amongst a haze of empty pint glasses and an impromptu mini session!

Another action packed afternoon saw a rare Tuckwell Jnr (37) victory and a scampering towards the rules book for a loophole in handicap reduction. Another solid round from Brown (35) saw a top 2 finish, followed by a ‘cleansed soul’ Daft (34) and Baker Snr (33) due a big score very soon – dependant on social calendar!